Hey everyone! It’s Juniper again! This time I’m writing for business, not pleasure-if my last post even counts as pleasurable. You see, as a senior member of the Student Planning Committee, I have to plan next year’s major school events. So I thought I would start by planning Homecoming, maybe give a few suggestions for Winter activities, and move on into Spring Fling. Apparently, this is unacceptable because we are supposed to focus on the last and most important event of the school year first: Prom.
Look, I have no problem with prom, OK? It’s an unofficial right of passage for our middle-class tribe. We dress like wealthy, mature adults, and then act like a clan of Bonobos. There’s nothing wrong with that (unless you don’t like to communicate through groin-rubbing), however, do we really have to plan sooooo far ahead?
Well, my concerns were overruled by the rest of the committee. My friend Justin, who I thought would defend me, was actually the most vocal on the importance of prom and mentioned how bad our high school has been at picking themes. I at least agree with him on this point.The “Sarah Palin” theme in ’09 was really weird, the “Book of Job” theme was nauseating, the “Right to Bare Arms” theme I’m pretty sure was incredibly illegal, and the “Abstinence” theme last year was just awkward. I’ve heard those themes were all chosen by Mrs. Dillard, who died last year. She was 91.
Well, if we’re raising that bar, we better make it a class-act. So I suggested “The Four Seasons.” People could wear dresses inspired by the different seasons, and we could have the school orchestra playing Vivaldi’s Spring as everyone’s coming in, and progress musically through the different seasons throughout the night!
The response was not enthusiastic. I suggested an informal prom. That suggestion unleashed a tidal wave of wrath and indignation upon me for daring to desecrate the holy purpose of prom with the idea of an informal dance. So, I said I’d think on it a few days, and decided to open it up to the people of Byron City (and beyond) for ideas. I hope I don’t regret this.
So what do you think would be a good theme for prom?