I really shouldn’t have had that extra piece of toast

Why, oh why, did I have to have that extra piece of toast?! Wow, what was I thinking? I’m wallowing in guilt right now.

Every morning, I wake up at 5am, run for an hour, lift weights for an hour, shower, and eat a piece of toast before heading to work, which usually tides me over until my next mini-meal at pre-lunch. But today…I don’t know, I was just SOOOOO hungry, and that second piece of toast looked really good and…I caved. Wow, my abs are going to hate me tomorrow…

Get thee behind me, Satan.

I mean, why couldn’t I just recognize the craving simply as my pancreas wanting to secret insulin to move glucose from the bloodstream to my muscles to stop the use of body-fat for fuel?! Am I really that stupid?!

I could have just substituted it for something better, like an apple slice or a gust of wind. Or just straightened all the paperclips in reception. That usually works. I definitely won’t be treating myself to a Diet Coke this week. Arg, I’m such a fat cow! And one of the pens in my pocket is taller than the other one!!

At least I don’t put honey on my toast anymore like I used to. Lol, I mean seriously, what was I thinking? Did I WANT to die of diabetes?

I won’t freak out. I’ll just do an extra hour of Zumba tonight, say thirty Hail Marys, and yell at myself in the shower, and it will be like it never happened.

Wait a sec, why is there an empty box of Girl Scout Thin Mints in the garbage? My receptionist doesn’t know I was hiding them behind the catheters…please tell me I didn’t…I don’t even remember eating them, the box was full one minute and then the next, I’m covered in crumbs, my heart is absolutely racing and…I’m canceling my appointments today, I need to do my P90X workout and lock my door 120 times…