Mayor Chuck Resigns! – Byron City News Digest

Mayor of Byron City, Mayor Charles “Chuck” Barther has resigned amidst bribery and corruption allegations, specifically appointing people to city council in exchange for political favors. He was indicted after audio and picture evidence revealed Mayor Chuck making a deal with Byron City’s Medieval Club to leave the Occupy Byron City protest, effectively ending the demonstration, in exchange for appointing one of their members to city council. Sir Ryan was appointed to the City Council shortly after the Occupy Byron City movement had ended.

Ex-Mayor of Byron City Charles “Chuck” Barther

Mayor Chuck has in the past maintained his innocence, saying he “never did anything illegal” and has accused Sir Ryan of blackmail, a charge Sir Ryan adamantly denies. However, apparently under pressure from the City council and protests at City Hall, this morning Mayor Chuck has stepped down.

“I wanted to keep serving the people in the town I love, keeping speed limits low and teenagers from making too much noise, but in light of recent events, the best thing for Byron City appears to be to step down,” said Mayor Chuck today at an early morning press conference. “So all of you can go shove it.”

At the end of the press conference, Chuck Barther removed his tie and flipped off everyone in the room. He reported went strait to Byron City Meadows Golf Resort for a strong glass of scotch.

Following Byron City law, City Council is expected to appoint a new Mayor by the end of the month.

County Fair Begins to Huge Success

The County Fair successfully kicked off at Moon’s Field yesterday morning in Byron City. This is the first time that Byron City has hosted the fair since the great “Mayonnaise Incident the last time they hosted the event [number] years ago.

The most popular attractions so far have been the Sausage Fest food tent, the Hurl-A-Whirl ride, and the Tunnel of Love (it is not recommended to do those things in order). Other attractions include “Porky’s Pig Racing,” “Paintball-a-Palooza,” and “Guess Where I’ve Hid My Hot Dog?”

The annual and ever-popular Weight-Gain-a-Thon, the competition to see who can gain the most weight in a single day at the fair, will be held Wednesday. Registraion closes end of day Tuesday.

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