The Superbowl was this past Sunday. I usually don’t watch it because of the subliminal messaging and radiation that comes through the television during large scale televised events, but this time I was watching it through a special deflector, and something came up that intrigued me. Just after halftime, as the Baltimore Ravens were completely destroying the 49ers, the power went off. Over 30 minutes later, the power was restored and the game continued. The 49ers came back to nearly win it. The game ended, life went back to normal.
Or so you thought.
You see, the power outage was no accident. Beyoncé isn’t a simple entertainer. And Colin Kaepernick’s tattoos mean something much darker than you could possibly imagine. Take a look again at the chain of events and tell me there is no connection.
Superbowl Blackout Chain of Events
End of Second Quarter — The Score: Ravens 21, 49ers 6
Halftime — Beyoncé Performs. Sings anti-marriage / government-forced celibacy song, “Single Ladies.” Beyoncé and her fans make illuminati triangle symbols with hands as they worship her during the performance.
Beginning of Third Quarter — Ravens score immediately on kick off.
Shortly after Raven’s Kickoff Score — Stadium goes dark
5min into Blackout — 49ers punter goes missing.
7min into Blackout — Oreo tweets this pre-prepared blackout ad.
13min into the Blackout — Ravens momentum has cooled off. A few fans witness Jay-Z in the shadows near the locker room entrance screaming at Joe Flacco.
22min into the Blackout — Colin Kaepernick disappears from the field for a few moments. Returns with new tattoo.
34min into the Blackout — Jim and John Harbaugh exchange secret hand signs.
35min into Blackout — Lights go back on, play resumes.
3rd Quarter — 49ers miraculously come back to make the game more exciting and lucrative for late-game advertisers.
4th Quarter Commercial Break — We are fed a subliminal TV commercial glorifying the virtues of manual farm labor and serfdom.
End of 4th Quarter — Ravens “take a safety” instead of kicking it off, making the final Score 34 – 31, the illuminati number of death.*
So those are the facts. Anything look suspicious? It should. And it’s no coincidence that Beyoncé just a few weeks prior lip-synced at the inauguration of fellow Illuminati leader Barack Obama. But why has the Illuminati so publicly flaunted their power? Why the secret death code? Why do players with dreadlocks never seem to have one ripped out accidentally during play? I haven’t connected all of the dots yet, but there’s definitely something they don’t want you to know. We may be on the eve of a new world order.
P.S. I’ve found the Mayor, and he’s currently tied up in my basement. I’ll deliver him when I’ve finished my investigation.
*3431, based on the letters on a standard US telephone, the numbers spell “Die.” The 1 has no letters on a telephone because, according to the illuminati, the number “one” represents their satanic leadership, which cannot be defined.