About jerrymillsdentist

Hey, I'm Jerry! I'm a dentist and a bit of a prankster (lol, we have fun) but an overall nice guy and the best neighbor you'll ever have, or as I like to call myself, a neighFUN, since I'm anything but a bore!

Seduce Her with Laughter!

laughing womenEvery woman gets flowers and chocolates on Valentine’s Day. I say, try something different! Give your lover the gift of a chuckle! A way to a woman’s heart is through her funny bone, that’s what I always say. It helped me get my wife when we started dating while I was still in dental school. I was giving her a root canal, my first one actually, and I started telling her my best jokes, and she was just rolling with laughter until tears came out! Looks like that root canal was our “route” to love! Ha, see what I did there?

Anyways, to help you laugh your way into love, here are some of my favorite Valentine’s Day jokes:

Valentine’s Day Jokes

What did the painter say to his Valentine?
I love you with all of my art!

Freida Pinto LaughingWhat do you say when a squirrel says it’s in love with you on Valentine’s Day?
You’re nuts so bad yourself!

What did the caveman give his cavewoman for Valentine’s Day?
Ughs and kisses!

What kind of flowers do you give a vegetarian on Valentine’s Day?
Cauliflowers!

What do you call two birds in love?
Tweethearts!

Woman: Do you love me more than sleep?
Man: I can’t answer now, it’s time for my nap!

Haha, that last one if my favorite! He goes to take a nap?! Are you serious?! While she’s asking you a serious question about love?!!! Hahaha, oh we have good times on Valentine’s Day. Wait wait, I have a few more:

See, even Adele can't resist a good joke!

Adele falls in love – with laughter!

Knock knock
Who’s there?
Howard.
Howard who?
Howard you like a big kiss, baby!

What did the stamp say to the envelope on Valentine’s Day?
I’m stuck on you!

Man: I can’t leave you!
Woman: Do you really love me that much?
Man: No, you’re standing on my foot!

Hahahaha, what?! Standing on his foot!? Where did that come from!? Out of left field, that’s where. Oh that is soooo funny, because she thinks he loves her, but he actually can’t get away because she’s standing on his foot! Oh, priceless. And that knock knock joke? I almost couldn’t finish typing I was laughing so hard. I’m definitely using that when I come home from work today.

Anywho, I’ll let you go now. I have over 100 of these prepared for my wife this year.She’s gunna love it. And they are all different jokes than the ones I told her last year. I’m the only old joke she’ll be with this year, haha! Get it? I’m old and I’m a joke? Ah, self-depreciating humor sure is fun.

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May The Floss Be With You – and more dentist humor

Hey guys, I’m Jerry! I’m a dentist and a bit of a prankster (lol, we have fun) but an overall nice guy and the best neighbor you’ll ever have, or as I like to call myself, a neighFUN, since I’m anything but a bore!

Hi, I’m Jerry!

I’ve been reading this blog for months and I thought to myself, “Doggone it, why haven’t I gotten into the blog thing yet?” So I thought I’d shake off these old stubborn fingers of mine and get a’typin’! It’s high time I introduced myself to Byron City on the world wide web.

Some of you already know me as your dentist. And you know that I’m not one of those “scary” dentists. I like to keep it fun so my patients don’t dread coming to see me. Because I pity the fool who don’t like going to the dentist! LOL, Mr. T.

But it’s true! I was just telling my dental assistant, Dana, the other day (well, she’s assistant to the regional dentist, haha, that’s from The Office) that, while most people hate seeing their dentist, my patients love me! She just rolled her eyes and went back to watching her youtubes video. Ha, that’s classic Dana. If I wanted to work a job where every one of my customers dreaded having to see me, I’d probably be an accountant. Haha, that’s just a joke. I love accountants. I told you we have fun here.

Anyhosier, here’s an example of what you might expect during an appointment with me. My assistant leads you in, and I say, “Come on in!I am the Dentanator! Come with me if you want clean teeth. Are you Sarah Connor?” while holding my arms out like the Terminator. Ha, I know your name isn’t actually Sarah Connor, I’m just doing that because it’s from the movie.

Then we’ll open up your mouth and take a look, and I might accidently shine the light in your eyes instead of your mouth and be like, “Oops, is the light too bright? Is it? Is it? Ha, guess you’re having a dental exam, not an eye exam!” I’m a bit of a prankster, I know.

Then we’ll take a look at your chompers to see if there are any little naughty cavities. “Cavity?! No candy for you! You come back one year!” Haha, but seriously, you should see a dentist more often than that. That’s just part of the joke, the Soup Nazi from Seinfeld. Which is funny, because he’s not actually a Nazi, Jerry just calls him that because he’s so, “No soup for you, ra ra ra, sieg heil!” you know? Like a Nazi? Oh, good times…

Ha, I LOVE these masks! Try not smiling when your dentist puts this on. I dare you 🙂

Well, then we’d fix your cavity. This is usually when I bust out my classic prank where I pretend I’ll have to yank your tooth out. My patients usually look a little scared and ask if there is anything I can do to save the tooth. “You want the tooth? You want the tooth!? You can’t handle the tooth!!!” That’s from A Few Good Men. Or I might go with “You are the weakest tooth! Goodbye!” You know, from that classic game show Weakest Link. What happened to that show? Or I’ll go to my never-fails Gollum impression: “Give me that tooth, we wants it, the precious!” Haha, oh, you should just see the laughs roll in and the tension melt away with that one. And my high school drama teacher told me I’d never have an acting career!

And then I’d finish off the work and send you out the door with a goodie bag containing a free toothbrush, floss, toothpaste samples, and some silly putty and fake tattoos! Like I said, we keep things fun here! Just don’t tell my wife about the tattoos 🙂

So I hope that gives you all a good idea of who I am, what I do, and what you can expect when you come to my office for a check up. You won’t be trembling or dreading an appointment at my place, I guarantee it!

So keep smilin’, keep brushin’, and I hope to see all of your pretty smiles at my office soon. May the floss be with you!