25 Ways to Tell if You’re at a Crappy Party

Well, it’s Friday! And you know what that means. Par-tay! But do you ever have that moment where you walk into a party and immediately know you’ve made a horrible mistake?

Sadly, not all of our most anticipated nights turn out to be all we hoped for. Just because the Black Eyed Peas have a “feeling that tonight’s gunna be a good night” doesn’t mean it ACTUALLY ending up being a good night.

So I thought I’d be helpful to all my dedicated blog followers, and instead of the usual post about dating, do a post on how to tell if you’re at a crappy party.

25 Ways to Tell if You’re at a Crappy Party

  1. The balloons outnumber the guests.
  2. As you walk in, all the guests are checking email on their cell phones.
  3. Everyone is wearing Hawaiian leis but no one is smiling.crappy party
  4. The stereo is playing “Jock Jams Volume VII.”
  5. When you walk in, the host is a little TOO happy to see you. Like a cast away spotting a rescue boat.
  6. That dude who brought the guitar only knows Bush and Nickleback songs.
  7. It’s potluck and 27 people “brought the napkins.”
  8. The host requires all guests to bring “a funny hat.”
  9. Half the funny hats are being worn by dogs.
  10. There’s only one other girl at the party, and the host refers to her as “mom.”
  11. You’re an hour late and there are STILL only a few cars in front of the party locale.
  12. There are free copies of “The Watchtower” next to the punchbowl.
  13. The party invitation included Microsoft clip art images.
  14. When you walk down the hall toward the party, you can’t tell which apartment has a party, and which apartment has old people who went to bed early.
  15. The ending time for the party is listed as “question mark” and a clever emoticon.
  16. The guy hosting the party also does your taxes.pet party
  17. You instantly check your watch the minute you walk in.
  18. That girl/guy you’re interested in has already thrown up on the couch. And there’s no alcohol at the party.
  19. The host suggests the guests try doing “improv.”
  20. During the party, you can’t help wishing you were having a Sims party on your Playstation instead.
  21. You spend most of the party talking about other better parties.
  22. Everyone is sitting. Everyone.
  23. There is humus and veggies, no drinks or sugary foods.
  24. You find yourself talking more to the pets than the people.
  25. By the end of the party, the babies are awake and the adults are asleep.
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One thought on “25 Ways to Tell if You’re at a Crappy Party

  1. Pingback: 10 Ways to Get Out of a Crappy Party | The City of Byron City

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