Well, it’s Friday! And you know what that means. Par-tay! But do you ever have that moment where you walk into a party and immediately know you’ve made a horrible mistake?
Sadly, not all of our most anticipated nights turn out to be all we hoped for. Just because the Black Eyed Peas have a “feeling that tonight’s gunna be a good night” doesn’t mean it ACTUALLY ending up being a good night.
So I thought I’d be helpful to all my dedicated blog followers, and instead of the usual post about dating, do a post on how to tell if you’re at a crappy party.
25 Ways to Tell if You’re at a Crappy Party
- The balloons outnumber the guests.
- As you walk in, all the guests are checking email on their cell phones.
- Everyone is wearing Hawaiian leis but no one is smiling.
- The stereo is playing “Jock Jams Volume VII.”
- When you walk in, the host is a little TOO happy to see you. Like a cast away spotting a rescue boat.
- That dude who brought the guitar only knows Bush and Nickleback songs.
- It’s potluck and 27 people “brought the napkins.”
- The host requires all guests to bring “a funny hat.”
- Half the funny hats are being worn by dogs.
- There’s only one other girl at the party, and the host refers to her as “mom.”
- You’re an hour late and there are STILL only a few cars in front of the party locale.
- There are free copies of “The Watchtower” next to the punchbowl.
- The party invitation included Microsoft clip art images.
- When you walk down the hall toward the party, you can’t tell which apartment has a party, and which apartment has old people who went to bed early.
- The ending time for the party is listed as “question mark” and a clever emoticon.
- The guy hosting the party also does your taxes.
- You instantly check your watch the minute you walk in.
- That girl/guy you’re interested in has already thrown up on the couch. And there’s no alcohol at the party.
- The host suggests the guests try doing “improv.”
- During the party, you can’t help wishing you were having a Sims party on your Playstation instead.
- You spend most of the party talking about other better parties.
- Everyone is sitting. Everyone.
- There is humus and veggies, no drinks or sugary foods.
- You find yourself talking more to the pets than the people.
- By the end of the party, the babies are awake and the adults are asleep.